I hate making decisions.

dao of st paul

I bought the new Third Eye Blind Album Ursa Major last week. I love 3eb outside of their 90's post-grunge blow-up. They are a band that takes me to certain moments in my life, all happy. I recommend checking it out if you have time...

I spent the last three years setting myself

On fire for you, I spent the last three years

Never knowing if what you say is true

And it will be this way til one of us dies

Is that a blessing in disguise?

And I tell myself what we're living for

And say rejoice evermore

Till one of us dies

Well I confess that so far happiness

Eludes me in my life

Better hurry up if it's ever to be mine

Better hurry up now if we're ever going to find

What we're living for

If it's not you anymore

I learn to sing

Evermore

Rejoice evermore

for so long i've had to bite my tongue

"We are never so vulnerable than when we trust someone - but paradoxically, if we cannot trust, neither can we find love or joy."

Where Do We Go From Here

My Boss thinks I seem stressed. Ya think? He has decided to take all of my tasks away from me, so we can reevaluate my attitude in a week. This is my downfall, I do believe. Sigh.

I went to my first therapy session today. It was interesting. I wish things like this didn't take so long. We'll see. I am supposed to make a list of all of the things I enjoyed prior to my junior year in highschool. Therapy is expensive. I hate having to ask my Dad for money, but my session is more than I make in a day. No joke.

I wore high heels today for the first time since the ankle accident. My ankle is still swollen, but I am tired of wearing my flats. They're all super worn in and make me feel self-conscious. I also have a tan line on my ankle/calf where the brace was. It looks like an icky sock tan line!

I have a crush on a boy, and I don't know what to do. Okay, let me be honest and say he is a man. There is more to this, but I don't feel like getting into it.

I am obsessed with Ann Taylor Loft. I have bought 3 dresses there in the past 3 weeks. I also got a cute skirt, and a couple of sweaters. I've also been shopping at the Gap a lot lately. Not sure what that is about.

hmmmmmm....

and the world spins madly on...

I let the day go by I always say goodbye

I watch the stars from my window sill

The whole world is moving and I'm standing still

Woke up and wished that I was dead

With an aching in my head I lay motionless in bed

I thought of you and where you'd gone

and let the world spin madly on

The Weepies

I need Tuesday.

13

I borrowed this from Nora over at Walking through the Rain.

1. One of your scars: how did you get it? I have a deep scar on my back from chicken pox when I was little.

2. What is on the walls in your room? Audrey Hepburn. I have movie posters, actual pictures, and drawings of her from various Etsy shops.

3. Do you snore, grind your teeth or talk in your sleep? I grind my teeth. Hello, TMJ.

4. What type of music do you listen to? Currently: Taking Back Sunday, You Me at Six, Jack's Mannequin, The All-American Rejects, My Favorite Highway

5. Do you get scared in the dark? Yes.

6. Coffee or energy drink? Coffee. Energy drinks make me shake.

7. Favorite quote?: “Your heart just breaks, that's all. But you can't judge, or point fingers. You just have to be lucky enough to find someone who appreciates you.” - Audrey Hepburn

8. Favorite Place? Hawaii, or in my bed.

9. Do you like your handwriting? Eh.

10. Mashed potatoes or macaroni and cheese? Mac n' cheese.

11. Republican or Democrat? I have things in common from both parties, but my family is Republican.

12. Kisses or hugs? Both.

13. What book are you reading? Does the new issue of Nylon count? I want to read Neil Gaiman's The Graveyard Book that Amy and her Mom lent me.

hard to write.